What have I learnt from being a mother to two 'gifted' kids? ==============================================
That it isn't possible to generalise and say that a gifted child will have given personality traits ......the child's personality is unique to that child .
A child with 'gifted' academic abilities may still have an emotional IQ comparable with (or even younger than) their peers and may struggle to know how to deal with being 'different' or finding things easy that other kids may need to work at. A bright but upset and emotionally young child can achieve startlingly sophisticated levels of manipulative behaviour (eg playing separated parents off against each other, at levels that are pretty hair-raising .....N has the intellectual capacity to fool adults that don't know him well!) - that can be challenging to manage successfully.
I don't feel that I'm being 'elitist' in wanting to acknowledge the 'giftedness', to stretch the boys and help them to focus - I believe that this is essential for both their academic and emotional development. When N is bored, his behaviour can pose problems, and so to me it seems important to help him to enjoy school, and it is also likely to boost his overall confidence levels. J can get very 'silly' and overly playful during lessons, which leads to disruption even though he doesn't intend to be disruptive. I feel that it is important to ensure that the child is adequately stimulated (though not pushed beyond what they wish to do) so that they enjoy their time at school and don't end up finding it so boring that they switch off .....which can lead to behavioural issues! My boys *need* to be kept busy enough if they are to continue to be interested in what school has to offer, and if they are to continue to develop their self esteem and sense of self worth.
However (rightly or wrongly!) I avoid using the term 'gifted' in conversations with them, and encourage them just to be themselves and to be comfortable with both their strengths and their weaknesses as people. I certainly don't wish to 'hothouse' or unduly pressure them to succeed academically - I just wish to ensure that they have enough stimulation to keep them happy as people.
