At some point in your first pregnancy, you always read a list of “what you need to by in preparation for you baby”. I remember it well, it covered two double spreads of a parenting magazine and included pretty much everything up to a private jet. The only useful item I bought, which I wouldn’t have otherwise, was a pair of nail scissors. Mainly because I had forgotten about babies having nails…or perhaps not really thought about it. But it has to be said that, after a few weeks of the baby scratching me and it, I probably would’ve come up with it myself.

A group of experienced mothers were asked to provide their lists and from these lists we have collated the definitive, Conker Exchange, what-you-need-to-buy-for-your-baby list.

• Point one for every pregnant Conker to remember: the shops will still open AFTER the birth.

• Point two: companies which provide lists are trying to sell their products.

• Prams and Baby Carriers: this was confusing. The strongest opinion that came across was that you have to get what’s right for you. Think about you situation very carefully, do you use buses a lot or the car, are you strong enough to carry a baby in a sling, do you go for long walks, are you short of cash, do you want a travel system to clip a car seat onto or is it important that the baby faces you? Most importantly, what does your baby want? Which suggests that you leave buggy-buying ‘til after the birth! Why not see if you can borrow a pram or carrier for a few weeks to see what you want? Once we used our first pram for a few weeks it was clear to us that we should have bought one with an adjustable handle. Don’t waste money, don’t be ripped off, just wait with that one ‘k?

• Changing mats and units: there was a level of agreement that changing mats are good, especially at the beginning. They wipe clean and are generally practical and hygienic. Changing tables, on the other hand, are either downright dangerous or a godsend. It depends on your child. Buy a changing mat, think about the unit. If your baby lies peacefully on the changing mat and you hate it being so low down…well, then you can always go and buy one…see point one!

• Cots and Moses Baskets: your baby will have to sleep somewhere. There is nothing wrong with co-sleeping, using a cradle, Moses basket or cot. This is a) a question of what you want, do you want to co-sleep? And b) what you can afford. There isn’t much point in spending more than you can afford on an all-singing, all-dancing cradle, a baby is perfectly happy to sleep in any warm and cosy place. And babies have a nasty habit of not going to plan. Just because you think the baby will love it’s cot in the nicely painted nursery does not mean that the baby will agree with you on that one.

• At this point I have to suggest that a crystal ball might come in handy, to see what you baby might like,

• Baby bouncer: this does not need to be bought before the birth and is something that can be borrowed to try out if the baby likes it.

• Car seat: if you ever intend to take your baby in the car, you need a car seat. Most hospitals in the UK will not let you leave the hospital in a car without your baby being strapped in properly. Car seats shouldn’t be bought second hand and should certainly not be used if they have been involved in an accident. A newborn baby should be in a backward facing car seat, strapped into a place where there is no airbag. A car seat is not an optional extra see here for a useful factsheet: http://www.thinkroadsafety.gov.uk/advice/childcarseats.htm

• Nappy bags/nappy disposal units/washable nappies: are you really, really sure you want to hear all this? Ok, I’ll give you the brief version because it could go on a bit otherwise: nappy bags are great, the cheapie ones smell best. Nappy disposal units are good if you live in a place where you can’t put rubbish out between collections. Washable nappies…well, Conker Exchange thinks they are great and will take a moment to promote them here (or rather, somewhere very soon!)
  

• Steriliser: Unless you have good reason to think that you will not be exclusively breastfeeding there is no point at all in buying any bottle feeding ingredients ‘til you know what you want and need. Again, shops will still open……

• Baby Monitor: a CCTV system was considered by most mothers asked to be a mad idea. However, the run off the mill radio thingies were often used. Important points to think about: can I hear noise coming from the baby’s room? If not, you may want a monitor. And: will the baby monitor work where I live? Some people have major problems with interference on them, hearing other babies screaming, picking up police radio etc. Baby monitors (if you think you will need one) really should be tried out pre-birth. If they are not suitable, take them back and try another one!

• Room thermometer: your baby’s bedroom will always be too hot or too cold. You will always panic. Chose a combination of ignorance and common sense and don’t bother with a room thermometer. A baby will often complain if too hot or cold, which is handy too. In the interests of safety though, if you don’t have any common sense when it comes to temperatures please buy a room thermometer!

• Bath thermometer: a direct quote here “an elbow or wrist is much easier and again baby is the best judge of temperature (some like it warmer than others)” And again, if you are the kind of person who takes cold baths or loves to plunge into boiling oil…for your baby’s sake, buy a thermometer!

• Some kind of dim night light so you can feed/change your baby with minimum disturbance. This got the thumbs up!

• Bouncy baby seat: this also got a more or less all round thumbs up. Only note of caution: get one with a cover which is EASY to take of and wash.

• Breastpump:  notes to come re hiring, and opinions of...

• For breastfeeders: Breastpads to soak up excess milk, there is nothing more disconcerting than feeling large wet patches spreading over your top whilst you are talking to someone “important”. And secondly, Kamilosan ointment: I quote “Kamillosan - manufactured by the gods that look after breastfeeding boobs” do you need to know more?!

• Play pen? Get it later! If you want one.

• Light blankets, muslins, bits of flannel…..when you’ve had your baby, you will be amazed by the joy you welcome any old bit of cloth with. Unless you have a baby who is never sick and/or a slave to do the washing for you, you will never, ever have enough cheap and cheerful cotton, easy wash, light, mop-up-cover-up-anything cloths.

• A zinc based cream: there are many on the market and they are excellent for red bottoms (usually the baby’s!).

• Baby bath: a baby bath isn’t strictly necessary but is handy and can be used for many other things. If you have a big sink and a storage space problem, you can easily do without one.

• A changing bag: especially those which match the pram/nursery/are on baby theme. Let’s face it, you’ll be carrying it. Go and look at them in a shop, get an idea of size, compartments required etc and then go to a normal bag shop and buy something along the same lines, which you and your partner can carry and keep your credibility intact.

• High chair: you won’t need one for months!! Recommended age for introducing solids is now 6 months. And you’re only 15 weeks pregnant….just d’nae worry about things like that yet!

Well, that’s it! But what is much more important than all of that and is never on the list is: you need you, a baby and a whole heap of love and good luck. Everything else can be improvised. Happy shopping!